Still Clickin

The vast majority of retirees spend their ‘golden’ years not only in the same town, but often in the same house. My wife and I, who spent practically all of our adult lives within seagull distance of the Atlantic, now find ourselves watching seagulls from the Pacific. We’ve not only changed houses; we’ve changed oceans.

Our first choice for our retiree home was a house on the East Coast that we thought would act as a magnetic and encourage visits from our three children. Unfortunately, the magnet had the wrong polarity. All three of our children landed in Seattle. Rather than live with phones and planes, we chose to pick up and engage the experience of West Coast living. After nearly five years of building a new nest and settling in, we still exchange glances at odd moments that say, “We did the right thing.”

What have we learned in the process?

1. The most important question every retiree must answer is not “Where will you be?” Instead, the real question is “How will you spend your time?” Activities of your choosing will define how live the rest of your life. Any destination you consider should be particularly suited to supporting how you want to spend your time. If alpine skiing tops your list of things you want to do, it is unlikely that Florida would be a good choice for you.
2. Location is the second most important choice for a retiree since it can enable or delimit so many other opportunities you will have. Make certain you are both comfortable with your reasons for changing your location. You both don’t have to have the same reasons, but you should understand what each other is expecting from the move.
3. Communication is key to this decision process. Some of you may be thirsting to try something new or to pursue a passion that has long festered. Others may want to get to, or return to, remote family or friends. You may find that some reasons may surprise you. But the only way to discover them is to talk a lot about it.
4. Once your general objectives for activities are clear, use them to build a balanced set of criteria for your new destination. Even if you already know the general area of your new location, you also have to decide on what are you looking for in any new home. Evaluating destinations seems to work best as an iterative process. Expect a few cycles of reevaluation before you start to feel comfortable with the ideas of both your choices. Obviously, there is no perfect home or place, but careful planning and discussion can increase your odds for success.
5. If possible, visit the new area a few times and talk to as many locals as you can. You want to find a place where people are quite willing to share their positive views. Each slice of geography and neighborhood has its own particular quirks. Use the time you have to learn as much as you can before you put the house on the market.
6. Once you are both comfortable with your decision, you must face the ugly realities of listing, selling, packing, and moving out. Home Buying and Selling can vary by market location, and the financial factors involved may influence some of your other choices. The only good thing about this process is that ultimately it has an end. The other side benefit is that you do get rid of a lot of ‘stuff’ that you have been meaning to discard for a long, long time.
7. The best advise we received for a major move was to rent for awhile before you buy any real estate. We thought we would avoid this step, but did not. In hindsight, we learned an awful lot during our rental period and made different purchase decisions as a consequence. For example, one of the first challenges in any new location is to [[find doctors, services]], and other resources to replace the familiar ones left behind. However, that search process can reveal a lot of subtleties about your new location that are impossible to detect otherwise.
8. Finding new friends can be the toughest challenge for seniors in any new setting. Since the kids have long flown the nest, the common meeting places of schools and youth activities no longer act as the common infrastructure for meeting and sharing with new friends. But friends are a critical component to any new location. Give yourself time, but fight any natural tendency you may have toward shyness. Prior to your move, research any local chapters of organizations or groups that you have belonged to in the past.
9. After you have learned the area and know what kind of home you are looking for, start your search and take your time. This may be your last nest, so make sure it has the features that are most important to you. Once you find it, you will both ‘know’, and the final stage of your relocation, ‘moving in’, can begin.

Some additional insights on relocation by seniors can be found in the Ohio State Senior Series.

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Most senior citizens simply stay put right where they are when they retire. They cherish the friendships they have established, the history they have lived, and their familiar grocers, doctors, druggists, etc. However, staying in the same town doesn’t necessarily mean staying in the same house. Downsizing is one trend that many active seniors embrace as a way of simplifying their lives and prolonging their independence.

The ties of family and grandchildren may pull others to unfamiliar locations where their children have become entrenched. Selecting new doctors, finding new dentists, and coping with this change can be a stiff challenge for any senior.

Others, especially those who have had to face frequent moves during their working lives, like the idea of a new place to retire. They are enticed by the latest “Best Places to Retire” article and the challenge of a new adventure.

On any “Now that I’ve Retired List”, location is placed first because it influences so many other choices. For example, telephones, taxes, insurance, legal, and caregiving all have rules that vary by state.

What’s a person to do??

Whichever you choose, re-evaluating your location is a healthy exercise . . . even if it is the old homestead. Your location can determine -

• to which hospital a call to 911 will deliver you,
• the range of community support services that are available to you,
• the types of activities that are readily available to you as well as,
• the amount of snow that will have to be shoveled to get you out of the house.

Some people make this choice quickly. Others spend time and consider the wide range of choices available, i.e.

1. Staying Put Keeping the same, familiar roof, where the pencil marks of the children’s heights on the door jam still mark the progress of their growth. Here, the support of old friends, the history with known doctors, and the connections developed over the years provide a personalized support network that is impossible to duplicate elsewhere.
2. Moving locally - Changing to another nest and neighborhood within the same community might offer a better fit for the needs of your newly evolving senior lifestyle while maintaining your lifelong network of friends and community around you.
3. Downsizing - Simplifying your life and reducing the demands required for the upkeep and care of your nest, a move to a smaller structure can prolong your ability to stay there as the clock keeps ticking.
4. Relocating farther away - Making a move to another community, state, ocean, or country is for the brave of heart. You can’t wait too long to make this move since the effort involved can be taxing. Evaluating destinations, together with its weather patterns, safety concerns, theater offerings, and recreation, can become a major project in and of itself. Once you decide on a place, those with wisdom advise renting for a year while you discover the innuendoes of the locale and its neighborhoods. During that time, you can address the challenges of a new place, e.g. to Find doctors, services as well as Finding new friends.
5. Retirement communities - For those that prefer the amenities of a planned community, developments designed for the 55+ crowd offer an alternative that many people find very attractive. It’s like moving into a neighborhood with an established network. Many people make this choice because the want to follow friends who are already there.
6. Active/Assisted living facilities - If one member of a couple has an emerging health issue, these facilities with built-in medical services can provide a support structure that tiers the living accommodations to the health of the individuals,where care is provided with housing
7. Living abroad - This move can scratch a lifelong itch of an adventurous soul. However, if adaptability is your strong suit, there are many locations in the world where you can stretch your dollar.

Of course, once you make your decision, then the financial issues, Renting versus Home Buying and Selling, must be considered. These are quickly followed by the practical issues of Moving and Home Maintenance.

For further reading, try the AARP Article on Housing Choices.

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If you’re reading this, you already know about the Internet. The use of the Internet by the senior community is continually expanding. And it doesn’t have to cost you anything. At local libraries, computers are siting there waiting for your curiosity and fingertips.

What do seniors do with the Internet when their fingertips start moving? According to a report by the Pew Research Center, they are involved with -

*Email - This still drives their primary usage of the Internet. Keeping in touch without the hassle of time zones and time charges, email remains the primary reason why people keep going back to the Internet. It’s especially delightful when the message is from your grandchildren. Free email accounts can be established at Yahoo and other services.

*Finding Information - Once they finish with their email, people typically switch to Google or Yahoo to find out about something. They might be planning a trip, researching a problem, or comparing different brands of toasters. Not surprisingly, Most Internet searches on health topics are performed by seniors.

*Online Shopping - Once they have completed their research, seniors are not afraid to actually make a purchase. As noted in the Pew Report, nearly 50% of the online seniors actually are making purchases. One area of particular interest is travel, both planning and booking tickets. They also are not afraid to both sell and buy items on eBay.

In addition to these top three activities, seniors also explore other facets.

*Reading News - If they’ve moved away, seniors are very likely to scan the pages of the old hometown newspaper online. They are also avid readers of specialized news topics on politics, entertainment, and other targeted sectors. Even the headlines of major newspapers, e.g. New York Times, are available online.

*Sharing Photos - Whether directly through email or via a service like Flickr, seniors love to see the latest images of their grandchildren, grandnieces, and grandnephews.

*Skype - If you are geographically removed from loved ones, skype is a treasure for everyone regardless of age. Simply speaking, skype not only allows you to talk to those you love, but to see and interact with them from many miles away. The visuals of loved ones make them feel so much closer, and it can ease the worries and loneliness that distance can engender.

*Social Sharing - Seniors have not flocked to Facebook or Twitter. They might view a My Space or You Tube link contained in an email, but they are not going to enroll. At this point in their lives, seniors are far less intrigued by the social and gaming aspects of the Internet than are the younger members of our society. Instant messaging holds as little appeal as instant gratification. They prefer to respect privacy and to savor the anticipation of a thoughtful reply. They find important items more interesting than urgent ones.

*Blogs - Because seniors have the time, there are a surprising number of blogs by, for, and about seniors. They are quite often frank, intelligent, and very thought-provoking. They can not only make for fascinating reading, but they can often make you chuckle, cry, and pray. One huge favorite blog that publishes links to many others is Ronni Bennett’s Time Goes By A visit to Ronni’s site is always worthwhile.

The Internet presents all of these facilities and more. It has become an indispensable part of our lives. You should encourage any of your friends that are not involved to take a free course at the library. They may feel uncomfortable at first, but they will thank you profusely later.

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Older citizens have seen a lot of new technology both come and go. Television, digital computers, digital cameras, digital anything, fax machines, scanners, the Internet, Betamax, VCR’s, DVD’s, cell phones, blackberries, iPods, and tweets. The list could go on and on.

Although it has changed, from party-line to private, rotary dial to touch tone, analog to digital, and wired to wireless, the old ‘home’ telephone has been one of the few constant technologies that has been with us throughout our lives. Telephones could always be relied upon. In the trade, they called it five-nines, i.e. 99.999%, reliable. There are no dead zones to break the connection of a wired ‘home’ phone, and it often still works whenever a house loses its electric power.

But mankind isn’t satisfied to leave things alone. So -

• wireless phones were introduced to the home. It was nice to be free of the cord, but now service is lost whenever you lose power.
• phone connections changed. New area codes, satellite and Internet connections, and fixed long distance charges have become the new standards.
• cell phones are replacing the ‘home’ phone. That social anchor called the ‘home’ phone is being abandoned for the ‘personal’ cell phone in many homes.
• payments for phone usage have never been more varied.

Although most seasoned citizens are keeping their reliable ‘home’ phone, change keeps intruding.

• In addition to the local telephone company, the cable company and others may offer the service.
• With an Internet connection, you can use skype or Vonage to route your calls directly over the Internet.
• Typically, long distance calling is bundled together with local calling for a flat monthly fee. How long you talk is no longer an issue.
• Now, you own your own phones, and you must buy and set them up yourself. The features and choices can become quite confusing.
• Internet and television services can also be bundled together with your phone service.

Most people don’t make a change until they must. If you must, however, what is a reasonable approach?

1. Service Provider -

• Because of the Internet, your choices have expanded. Often, you are not limited to the local franchise, e.g. Verizon, you can also consider other providers like Vonage, Earthlink, or Comcast.
• The simplest way to find out what choices your have for your home is to go to White Fence, a web site that searches the Internet for all of your options. All you have to do is enter your home address.
• Another search service is Connect My Phone, but is not as comprehensive.

2. Telephone Sets -Typically, you now have to buy your own phone. There are a wide variety available - wired, wireless, multi-line, answering machines, etc. To help with this decision, go to any of the price comparison sites, e.g.

• BizRate,
• NexTag, or
• Deal Time.

These sites can give you a sense of the variety available and their costs. However, if you want local support, don’t forget the local Radio Shack or Sears.

If you know that you’ll have to make a change at some time in the near future, don’t wait to do your research. The last thing you want to do is be without a phone!

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Although some individuals are still covered by company and union health plans once they start Turning Age 65, fewer and fewer people have that opportunity. By far, Most US citizens discover that they have come under the Medicare umbrella. Whatever other insurance they may consider, it is all influenced by Medicare. Or, if your income level provides that alternative, Medicaid. (A few qualify for both.)

What do these choices mean?

Original Medicare Part-A provides hospitalization coverage for no charge. It doesn’t cover everything, but it does cover a lot. The key words for coverage are “medically necessary” procedures, i.e. those required to keep you alive and functioning. Once you get in to “elective” or “experimental” procedures, you are no longer covered. For example, it does not cover private rooms, private nurses, or even TV and phones in the room because they are not “medically necessary”. Basically, during each year it covers hospital stays for -

• days 1 - 60 after $1,068 deductible,
• days 61 - 90 at $267/day,
• days over 90 at $534/day, which are deducted from a 60-day pool of “lifetime reserve days”, and
• days beyond the pool of “lifetime reserve days” at full coverage.
• Charges for blood as well as home, hospice, of skilled nursing facility care are determined separately.

Original Medicare Part-B provides coverage for doctors, lab work and other medical services. There is a monthly charge for this coverage which amounts to $96.40 during 2010. The coverage is limited to the Medicare-approved amount for the Medicare-approved services. For example, a colonoscopy is limited to once every ten years, or two years for high-risk patients. Basically, after an annual deductible of $135, Part-B covers -

• 80% of doctors services and medical devices,
• 100% of clinical lab and home health services, and
• other “medically necessary” services after a co-pay or co-insurance deductible.

Original Medicare Supplement policies, Medigap fill in some of the gaps left by deductibles and co-pays. The coverage offered by these policies is strictly formulated by Medicare and specified by the letters A through N. (Plans E, H, I, and J are being phased out.) Until now, F has been the most popular. Although the coverage of each lettered plan is specific, the companies and charges vary by state.

Medicare Advantage, i.e. Part C plans, are privately run HMO alternatives to Original Medicare. Your care is generally restricted to the doctors and facilities that are members of that organization. Essentially, the government pays your Medicare allocation directly to these plans. The plans then set up their own internal rules for coverage as well as any additional charges that may apply. These plans vary on a state-by-state basis, and must be reviewed in that context.

Medicare Part-D Drug Plans, which also vary state-by-state, provide coverage for prescription drugs. Unless you have other drug insurance, you must sign up for one of these plans within four months of turning 65 to avoid being charged a late penalty.

Medicaid programs offer more extensive coverage to people with limited income and resources. This program is jointly funded by both federal and state governments, so it also varies state-by-state.

Go to the government’s Medicare Web Site for more information and for links to individual state programs.

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Most of us picture our homes as castles or nests. Places of comfort and security. Insurance agents look at things differently. They have to. Its their job.

“Picture your own home on fire”, was the comment of an old insurance pro that had been in the field for years. “Think of all the questions that the firefighters have to answer.”

“In what part of the home did the blaze start? Are there people inside? How many trucks have responded? Are any ambulances on the way? How close are the hydrants? Is the water pressure adequate? Is there natural gas or propane at the home? Is it turned off? Are there cars, i.e. mobile gas tanks, inside the garage? Are there cars in the way on the street? Are any nearby homes threatened?”

As you envision these questions and their responses, think of the actions that you, as a homeowner, could take to prepare. It may be time to review your escape plan for every member of the family and practice it. Also -

• Do you have the fire alarm number on your speed dial list?
• Do you have a working flashlight near the bed?
• Have you put new batteries into your smoke detectors this year?
• Do you have a working fire extinguisher near the stove?
• Do you know where your gas main shutoff valve is?
• Does your assembly point still work, or have those people moved?

Also consider how your home is situated. Is there someone you can call to assess your location?

• How close are you the fire station?
• What is the water pressure like in your area?
• Can the fire engines access your home easily?

Any thought of a home fire is terrifying. The preparation necessary to develop an escape plan is sufficiently worrisome that people can put it off so that they will not have to have think about it. But that is short-sighted. A handy extinguisher or a quick exit give you options in the event of a calamity. They can help a great deal.

For more information, look at the -

• Fire Safety site,
• USFA guide, and
• NACHI check list.

Have you practiced your escape plan lately?

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Recently, one member of our family had a Zero Birthday. The family all gathered, and we had a wonderful evening to celebrate this special event. It wasn’t just another birthday, it was a Zero Birthday. It deserved special treatment.

We all seem to measure our lives by Zero Birthdays.

• At One and Zero, you’ve made it to the fifth grade and you’re not a baby anymore. You’ve become more confident of your likes and dislikes. You have friends, and you have fun. You’re doing more important chores that really help at home. Sometimes, the stories you imagine yourself are better than to ones you see on TV. You’re starting to learn that you are better at some things and worse at others.

• At Two and Zero, you’re not quite legal, but almost. The trauma of teenage years seem a distant memory, and you’ve developed a much better sense of yourself. You’ve moved away from home and consider yourself independent. You’re starting to realize that you might not have all the answers. You’ve just noticed that your parents suddenly seem to be getting a lot smarter.

• At Three and Zero, you know you’re a real adult, whatever that is. You’ve faced, made, and are making a number of life-defining choices, e.g. marriage, parenthood, education, career, location, and friends. You’ve got more choices to make, but you are comfortable making them. You know that there are people that really count on you. Life is very engaging, but can be very frenetic.

• At Four and Zero, you wonder if you’re starting to get ‘old’ because you’re no longer thirty-something. You’ve gotten to know yourself pretty well and are becoming comfortable with that picture. If you have teenagers, you are learning what wallpaper feels like, ever present but ignored. Your career is now defined, and you have achieved a few distinctions and bruises in the process. You are making more than you had planned, but you wonder if you are peaking. You measure yourself, probably too harshly, and wished you had attained more. Some friends always seem to be able to be doing more. Other friends have fallen away, but you know a select few will hang with you forever.

• At Five and Zero, the wrinkles in the mirror are sending you the message that the clock keeps ticking. You really don’t feel ‘old’, but you know that the jump in your step isn’t quite as bouncy. You’ve felt the sting of college tuitions, and the shock that your former teenagers are talking to, rather than at, you and are listening for your answer. Your kids act like they are adults, even though you picture them at age ten, or two. You’re ‘established’ in your community and have felt the joys of many achievements. You are reaping the fruits of your career, both positive and negative.

• At Six and Zero, you’re worried about this looming specter called retirement. Have you saved enough, and more importantly, what will you DO? You’re very engaged in a number of activities, and your daily schedule has many facets to it. You can’t imagine loosing that diversity, so you push it out of your mind. Your greatest delight is the arrival of grandchildren. You notice that the wrinkles have become deeper, and a couple of gray hairs have appeared in your eyebrows. You’ve decided to ignore the latest technical gizmo and have dismissed it as trivial. You’re learning the first names of a few new doctors.

• At Seven and Zero, you assume you’ll be offered the senior discount without asking for it. You’re not an ‘elder’, but you’re definitely a ‘senior’. You’ve begun to notice that younger people dismiss you, with kindness, or simply ignore you. You’re starting to think more and more about the big questions of life and living, and suddenly the questions seem to have become simpler, the answers more obvious. You know you are now officially ‘old’, and you know that your bones get stiff and creak where they never did. Your memory skills may not have ebbed, but you treat them as if they did. You hear the clock ticking more loudly in your mind.

• At Eight and Zero, you celebrate having made this milestone. Haven’t had the experience, so only conjecture is possible, but you must start hearing the word ‘elderly’ more and more. If you’re not committed to a certain amount of regular physical exercise, you’ll start overhearing the word, ‘frail’, when others nearby are conversing. Time for health maintenance activities has to take up more of your day.

• At Nine and Zero, ????

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When our children were young, there were times that I would forget and kiss them with unshaven lips. When they would shout, “Daddy, stop that”, I would respond with one of our standard family lines, “Sometimes love hurts.”

As everyone in any family grows older, we can sometimes unknowingly hurt one another with our emotional whiskers. And as everyone in every family knows, holiday times are often the moments during which such whiskers can especially chafe. It seems like every other holiday movie is built around this theme. We just saw, “Nothing Like the Holidays”, and it certainly explores that theme.

Because of the pervasive atmosphere of good will and good cheer, the holiday season raises our expectation levels, and we all apply our highest levels of expectation to the members of our own families. But, if you want to, it is really easy to avoid the risk of those emotional whiskers by careful and thoughtful action. Specifically -

• If you see each other often enough during the year, misunderstandings don’t build and fester.
• The key to all healthy relationships, communication, generally resolves any issues before they build up.
• For those that are separated by geography, regular visits over Skype, the Internet video phone, can help bridge the separation and encourage further communication.
• Obviously, you have to commit yourself to work on any relationship, but particularly those within your own family. The emotional whiskers grow whenever family members are taken for granted.

With young children, the holidays are a natural time to celebrate them, their lives and aspirations. As these children grow, to age 20 or 60, that desire for celebration still exists. It began with the family and will always center itself there. Now is the season to steep yourself in that joy. It is where we learn the meaning and dimensions of the word Love, even if . . . “Sometimes love hurts”.

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Selecting a computer was once a choice between an Apple and the PC. Then laptops were added to desktops. Now there are netbooks, mini PC’s, mini home theater PC’s, all-in-one’s, etc., etc.

But all these choices don’t have as much impact on the age 65+ market where an AARP poll reports that less than half of those seniors ever use a computer.

Is there any way for them to bridge that gap?

I have a relative, whom I love dearly, who does not use a computer. Her dear husband did, but he is now pushing daisies rather than pulling them. So she is left without email. Her grandchildren can’t send her photos of their latest activities. She lives “without a net.”

I suspect that we all know someone like that, and in some ways, we envy them. Computer viruses, spam, and printer cartridges are things they simply do not have to think about. They can ignore all the warnings about fraudulent vendors on eBay. Backup is what they do when they drive out of the garage. Files are only used for manicures.

But those of us that live with computers can no longer conceive of a life without them. Email is a daily affair. We are always investigating something on Google. And yet, we are frustrated to know that there are people with whom we can’t share certain things because they are not linked in. Is there any way to bridge this gap?

One low impact way to both learn about and use a computer is to visit one of your area’s Local Libraries. Most libraries today have multiple computers available for their clients. Usually there is a sign-up sheet. Although there may be a time limit of an hour or two, this restriction usually applies only after the hour that school is out.

But in addition to easily accessible computers, libraries quite often offer training. They particularly want to encourage participation among senior citizens. Inquire at your own local library, and I suspect you will be amazed at the amount of support available. For example, one library in Florida offers an extensive program of courses. And they are all free.

So if you are a senior citizen with an inch of curiosity, try a computer at your local library. You might be surprised at how much you enjoy the experience.

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There are certain rites of passage that one must experience as an active senior citizen in this US of A. You first sign up for the AARP because you want to become aware of what’s going on in Washington and elsewhere. Then, it gets serious when you become a card-carrying Medicare enrollee. After that, comes Downsizing and Volunteering. This holiday season we took the next step, the Artificial Christmas Tree.

For a number of years we heard the comments. ‘Everyone said’ that a real tree was simply too much of a hassle. Think of all the effort and strain involved. You have to - go to the lot, tie it to the car, get it off the car, fresh cut the base, set in water, set it into the stand, move it into the house, fill the base with water, clean up the needles, trim the odd branches, string the lights, and keep watering it throughout the season. As you get older, all of this hassle will become too much and you will simply have to change to an artificial tree.

We heard this advise for years, and gleefully ignored it. We’ve always had a real tree and cherish those memories - going to the tree lots of the church or Boy Scouts, then making the expedition to the tree farms with the kids and chopping our own, going to the tree farms with the dog when the kids were older, scaling back to the convenience of trees from a chain store. But the trees were real. The scent pervasive. We were proud to host the Balsams, Scotch Pines, Douglas firs, Frasers, and Nobles. It meant that the season had truly arrived.

Convinced that sooner or later we had to make the change, this year we faced this next rite of passage. We went out and bought a poly-something tree. Frankly, I was a bit embarrassed when I checked out at the register. I threw the box into the trunk of the car since there was no need to tie it on. Then, brought it home, set it up, spread out each little ‘branch’, plugged it in, and . . . Viola! Instant Christmas.

We brought in some pine branches to add a bit of scent, but I feel a bit less authentic this year. It is easier. It has a perfect shape. There is no need to water, but . . . somehow, I miss the hassle. I’m not sure I was ready for ‘easier’.

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