When our children were young, there were times that I would forget and kiss them with unshaven lips. When they would shout, “Daddy, stop that”, I would respond with one of our standard family lines, “Sometimes love hurts.”
As everyone in any family grows older, we can sometimes unknowingly hurt one another with our emotional whiskers. And as everyone in every family knows, holiday times are often the moments during which such whiskers can especially chafe. It seems like every other holiday movie is built around this theme. We just saw, “Nothing Like the Holidays”, and it certainly explores that theme.
Because of the pervasive atmosphere of good will and good cheer, the holiday season raises our expectation levels, and we all apply our highest levels of expectation to the members of our own families. But, if you want to, it is really easy to avoid the risk of those emotional whiskers by careful and thoughtful action. Specifically -
- If you see each other often enough during the year, misunderstandings don’t build and fester.
- The key to all healthy relationships, communication, generally resolves any issues before they build up.
- For those that are separated by geography, regular visits over Skype, the Internet video phone, can help bridge the separation and encourage further communication.
- Obviously, you have to commit yourself to work on any relationship, but particularly those within your own family. The emotional whiskers grow whenever family members are taken for granted.
With young children, the holidays are a natural time to celebrate them, their lives and aspirations. As these children grow, to age 20 or 60, that desire for celebration still exists. It began with the family and will always center itself there. Now is the season to steep yourself in that joy. It is where we learn the meaning and dimensions of the word Love, even if . . . “Sometimes love hurts”.
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